Dickie Bird by Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Lyrics

[from Harrison Von Harrison Jr.’s Production of Daddy’s Boy!]

Introduction (spoken)
[Policeman]
Well well well what do we have here? Two little lovebirds cannodling behind a dustbin? Uh, ooh ooh. I beg your pardon sirs

[Daddy]
My Eldridge and i were just doing some calisthenics

[Eldridge]
I need to be my trimmest, officer. See, I report for duty in Cape May in, well, less than 24 hours

[Daddy]
Can you begrudge a father one last romp with his boy before the Navy ruins him?

[Policeman]
My apologies to you and your adult son, sir. I mistook you for a pair of common street screwers

[Daddy]
Not to worry, my good man. It’s like my grandpapa always told me…


In Song
[Daddy]
Listen to the twiddle of the little dickie-bird
Sometimes what you think you hear
Is not quite what you heard

[Eldridge]
Twiddle-dee, twit two
Means “I love you”
Tweet-twoo twidle dee
Means “get off of me”

[Daddy]
Tweetie, tweetie, tweetie
Means “you’re my little sweetie”
Twattie twittie twittle
Means “to your right a little”

[both]
Oh, dickie-bird, dickie-bird
Dickie-bird do
Trying to tell you that I love you
Like the dickie-bird do!
[boy]
Extry, extry! Read all about it!
Germany mounts offensive against Poles

[Eldridge]
I must go!