At A Seaside Town In 1869 by Thomas Hardy Lyrics

(Young Lover's Reverie)

I went and stood outside myself,
        Spelled the dark sky
        And ship-lights nigh,
And grumbling winds that passed thereby.

Then next inside myself I looked,
         And there, above
        All, shone my Love,
That nothing matched the image of.

Beyond myself again I ranged;
        And saw the free
         Life by the sea,
And folk indifferent to me.

O 'twas a charm to draw within
         Thereafter, where
         But she was; care
For one thing only, her hid there!
But so it chanced, without myself
        I had to look,
        And then I took
More heed of what I had long forsook:

The boats, the sands, the esplanade,
        The laughing crowd;
        Light-hearted, loud
Greetings from some not ill-endowed;

The evening sunlit cliffs, the talk,
        Hailings and halts,
        The keen sea-salts,
The band, the Morgenblatter Waltz.

Still, when at night I drew inside
        Forward she came,
        Sad, but the same
As when I first had known her name.

Then rose a time when, as by force,
         Outwardly wooed
         By contacts crude,
Her image in abeyance stood . . .

At last I said: This outside life
        Shall not endure;
        I'll seek the pure
Thought-world, and bask in her allure.
Myself again I crept within,
        Scanned with keen care
        The temple where
She'd shone, but could not find her there.

I sought and sought. But O her soul
        Has not since thrown
        Upon my own
One beam! Yea, she is gone, is gone.

From an old note.