Amberwood by The Thought Lyrics
[Intro]
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
[Hook]
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
[Verse]
It was 2007, getting settled in a new place
New space, first-time apartment like a tooth-ache
Neighbors make a racket, that's a constant when it's too late
But this ain't where it happened, and I got my own room
Great!
Time to make adjustments expedited by fate
Mom was talking to the doctor and the news she got was grave
She was diagnosed with cancer, still determining the stage
I'm too shocked to answer, filled to bursting with pain
So she's giving us the breakdown of how the treatment goes
And I'm giving up, I break down, I let my weakness show
'Cause I realize that if she dies I'm stuck with my dad
When my brother chimes in with "what will happen to the cat?"
It took all I had that day just to let that phrase slide
I just bottled up my rage, and I walked away, crying
It's like he's lying to himself, or he's not even trying
To see the truth for what it is, that our Mother could be dying!
I should've seen the warning signs that he really didn't care
Whether keeping Father's lies or deleting his despair
There's a seed you can't repair when you don't even see you're spared
There's a reason in our family tree, I do declare!
So I re-dedicate to anything I think impressed her
Hating on my brother, he too focused on his dresser
Spent my life the lesser of the two, yet the aggressor
So I'm asking her "What can I do?", I feel the pressure
So I'm raising up my grades and I'm playing some sports
There's just something 'bout a game, an equalizer of sorts
I'm still quiet 'bout my pain, Dad still pulling off my shorts
While the tension in my brain is denied all support
I know it's self-absorbed to phrase it like that, but it's fact
It took a decade to sort the real Jack from the act
You can track it in tracks I've fashioned since I got my spirit back
Got no malice for my brother, let me be clear with that
Skipping past the madness of our Mother's diagnosis
At long last, her day of surgery approaches
Panicked, asking for a status while we stuck on the ocean
Basking feels atrocious next to anesthetic doses
They apathetic and loafing, just seems so callous to me!
Got the tonics and toasting, Roy's just happy-as-can-be!
I guess it's just anxiety, I shouldn't make a scene
Unless I'm aiming for varieties of something obscene
[Hook]
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
[Verse]
Now it's 2011, and our Mom is cancer-free
Matter fact, she doing better, almost got her PhD
I've been lost in puppy-love, don't know how my brother be
But I'm gonna hook him up, if he ever needs some weed
I'm up at PCC, he's a High School Freshman
Sibling-rival energy, he just believes in "Who freshest?"
We still fight like once a week and barely speak beyond knocked doors
I didn't see the leak, I just chalked it to blocked pores
But I just buried the lede, 'cause by this time I had spoken
Out about the abuse and brought shit out in the open
But when you doubt the accuser and thought their story was woven
You just shout "What a Loser!", and call your family "stolen"
With my departure, it's broken, I bring dishonor on them all
But my Father's dishonest and my brother hasn't the balls
He's too willing for a bribe, take that walk into the mall
"Jack is lying, Roy, I promise. Now, what size are you? Small?"
I called the truth for what it was and just got viewed as a traitor
All of you know what he's done but it's too crude for your favor
And please excuse me for anger, it's just emotional labor
Waste my time explaining danger to familial strangers, shit...
Skip forward to later, let's say 2019
And Roy just toured, making paper off the music pipe dream
And he's doing quite great! Really nothing like me
Tryn'a catch him on stage while he's still coming up clean
I pull up to a show and pay full-price for a ticket
I ain't tripping, he's my bro and I'll support 'cause I'm liquid
I had listened to the album quite extensively, I'm with it
But I give that I'm a phantom, like aggressively hidden
So I quicken to the stage, sudden sickness and rage
As I witness that the layout is the street where we stayed
He's repping Amberwood Drive while his songs start to play
Like that ain't the room where he denied his brother got raped
I cried and died inside, it seemed escape was my only option
But I stuck out for the ride and he was great, by a margin
And I want to pardon youth like "he's just being naive"
But I feel him guard the truth like he still never believed
Now honestly, I grieve, don't know if this can be repaired
There's something he can't leave, and he shows that he don't care
Where did I relieve myself of any faith he could spare?
He won't even tell my rapist that he needs to clear the air
[Hook]
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
[Hook]
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
[Verse]
It was 2007, getting settled in a new place
New space, first-time apartment like a tooth-ache
Neighbors make a racket, that's a constant when it's too late
But this ain't where it happened, and I got my own room
Great!
Time to make adjustments expedited by fate
Mom was talking to the doctor and the news she got was grave
She was diagnosed with cancer, still determining the stage
I'm too shocked to answer, filled to bursting with pain
So she's giving us the breakdown of how the treatment goes
And I'm giving up, I break down, I let my weakness show
'Cause I realize that if she dies I'm stuck with my dad
When my brother chimes in with "what will happen to the cat?"
It took all I had that day just to let that phrase slide
I just bottled up my rage, and I walked away, crying
It's like he's lying to himself, or he's not even trying
To see the truth for what it is, that our Mother could be dying!
I should've seen the warning signs that he really didn't care
Whether keeping Father's lies or deleting his despair
There's a seed you can't repair when you don't even see you're spared
There's a reason in our family tree, I do declare!
So I re-dedicate to anything I think impressed her
Hating on my brother, he too focused on his dresser
Spent my life the lesser of the two, yet the aggressor
So I'm asking her "What can I do?", I feel the pressure
So I'm raising up my grades and I'm playing some sports
There's just something 'bout a game, an equalizer of sorts
I'm still quiet 'bout my pain, Dad still pulling off my shorts
While the tension in my brain is denied all support
I know it's self-absorbed to phrase it like that, but it's fact
It took a decade to sort the real Jack from the act
You can track it in tracks I've fashioned since I got my spirit back
Got no malice for my brother, let me be clear with that
Skipping past the madness of our Mother's diagnosis
At long last, her day of surgery approaches
Panicked, asking for a status while we stuck on the ocean
Basking feels atrocious next to anesthetic doses
They apathetic and loafing, just seems so callous to me!
Got the tonics and toasting, Roy's just happy-as-can-be!
I guess it's just anxiety, I shouldn't make a scene
Unless I'm aiming for varieties of something obscene
[Hook]
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive
[Verse]
Now it's 2011, and our Mom is cancer-free
Matter fact, she doing better, almost got her PhD
I've been lost in puppy-love, don't know how my brother be
But I'm gonna hook him up, if he ever needs some weed
I'm up at PCC, he's a High School Freshman
Sibling-rival energy, he just believes in "Who freshest?"
We still fight like once a week and barely speak beyond knocked doors
I didn't see the leak, I just chalked it to blocked pores
But I just buried the lede, 'cause by this time I had spoken
Out about the abuse and brought shit out in the open
But when you doubt the accuser and thought their story was woven
You just shout "What a Loser!", and call your family "stolen"
With my departure, it's broken, I bring dishonor on them all
But my Father's dishonest and my brother hasn't the balls
He's too willing for a bribe, take that walk into the mall
"Jack is lying, Roy, I promise. Now, what size are you? Small?"
I called the truth for what it was and just got viewed as a traitor
All of you know what he's done but it's too crude for your favor
And please excuse me for anger, it's just emotional labor
Waste my time explaining danger to familial strangers, shit...
Skip forward to later, let's say 2019
And Roy just toured, making paper off the music pipe dream
And he's doing quite great! Really nothing like me
Tryn'a catch him on stage while he's still coming up clean
I pull up to a show and pay full-price for a ticket
I ain't tripping, he's my bro and I'll support 'cause I'm liquid
I had listened to the album quite extensively, I'm with it
But I give that I'm a phantom, like aggressively hidden
So I quicken to the stage, sudden sickness and rage
As I witness that the layout is the street where we stayed
He's repping Amberwood Drive while his songs start to play
Like that ain't the room where he denied his brother got raped
I cried and died inside, it seemed escape was my only option
But I stuck out for the ride and he was great, by a margin
And I want to pardon youth like "he's just being naive"
But I feel him guard the truth like he still never believed
Now honestly, I grieve, don't know if this can be repaired
There's something he can't leave, and he shows that he don't care
Where did I relieve myself of any faith he could spare?
He won't even tell my rapist that he needs to clear the air
[Hook]
I found my soul
Dug right out the hole
Failed to find myself home
On Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive, yeah
I lost my bro
To social growth
And broken molds
From folks at home
Amberwood Drive
Amberwood Drive