Its the Beer Talking by The Lancashire Hotpots Lyrics

[Intro/Bernard Talking]
Well, that's enough, one pint's enough for any man
Just time to pop home now and see what Jean's got in cupboard fer-
[Pint of Beer]
Bernard! Bernard down 'ere! (Who's that?)
Bernard it's me! Pint-a!
's Pint-a-beer! (No. Ger' out)
C'mon, you've got time fer' one! (Stop it!)
It won't do yer any 'arm! (You're goin' get me in trouble!)
No, she won't know (Really?)
C'mon, let me sing you a song about how delicious I am (If you insist)

Drink me, drink me drink me now
If you wanna have a good time I'll show ya how
If you don't drink me, I'll go to waste
You're not an alcoholic, you just like the taste
Drink me, drink me drink me now

Drink me, drink me drink me fast
Have another pint, you're gonna have a blast
I'm the best drug there's been on the market yet
I can make you remember, I can make you forget
Drink me, drink me drink me fast
There's a banking crisis
World food shortage
Climate change of course
But there's no need to worry about that
When you're on the sauce
Forget your troubles
Have another round
Get proper off-your-face
If you carry on drinking
I'll make the world a better place

So drink me, drink me drink again
I'm what separates the boys from the men
Some people say I've ruined your life
But you'd rather be with me than at home with the wife
Drink me, drink and drink again

Drink me, drink me drink me quick
Have another pint, I promise you, you won't be sick!
Inside that barrel there's fifty others
Drink me and all my sisters and brothers!
Drink me, drink me drink me quick

Drink me, drink me straight away
I promise, I'm not trying to lead you astray
Some people say I'm a terrible curse
But the taxes on me pay the wages of a nurse
Drink me, drink me drink me
Drink me, drink me drink me
Drink me, drink me drink me now
DRINK!

[Bernard, talking]
Oh! Come 'ere you little beauty!
*gulping*
Ohhh, I love you!