Santa Up Devil Down by The Cast of King Falls AM Lyrics

[BEN]
Ladies and gentlemen
Please put your hands together
For the one
The only
Mr. Xavier
“Get right with God”
Hawthorne!

[REVEREND HAWTHORNE]
Brothers and sisters, let me just bend your ear
I’m here to tell a tale we can only say once a year
Some of you know but I’m guessing most of you do not
A little story about a husky red hero, a personified toys for tots
Ho ho, but it’s not all fun and games, you see
'Cause a horny red devil loves to spread misery
He don’t like it none when Santa spreads his cheer
And that’s one reason we keep him far away
From here

[HAWTHORNE & CAST]
He’s a big ball of evil with a horny sharp tail
(Santa up, devil down)
Whirlwind of hatred sent straight from hell
(Santa up, devil down)
But he ain’t no match for this thing called love
(Santa up, devil down)
That our [?] sent straight from above
(Santa up, devil down)
[CAST]
Santa up
Devil down
Better watch that ass
The man in red's in town
He’s got a list
He’s checked it twice
Now's the time for the devil to
Pay the price

[HAWTHORNE & CAST]
Santa up
Devil down
Santa up
Devil down

[HAWTHORNE]
Oh, we’re coming for you, devil
Watch it!
Gonna lay it on ya, y’all

[HAWTHORNE & CAST]
Now our little buddy Santa with his beard so white
Ain’t gonna let the devil go without a hell of a fight
(Ooh, no he won’t)
But the devil is a scrapper, so angry, so mean
He loves to fight dirty, he ain’t never fought clean
(Mmm, he fights dirty, dirty)
Beelzebub laughs with evil in his eyes
He’ll knock your granny down and make your babies cry
(Ooh, not baby Jesus)
Yes!
So he waits in the dark until he sees [?]
And kids, what do you know, it’s time for a fight
It’s good for [?], the grandest of signs
Let’s hear Father Christmas kick the devil’s behind
[CAST & HAWTHORNE]
Santa up (Uh!)
Devil down (Hey now!)
Better watch that ass
The man in red's in town (Watch it!)
He’s got a list
He’s checked it twice
Now's the time for the devil to
Pay the price

[HAWTHORNE & CAST]
Santa up
Devil down
Santa up
Devil down

Now Satan, he tries not to get [?]
But he ain’t no match for that Santa-Cat
Comin' at ya!
Flyin' through the air
So wholesome, so quick
Every present he gives a kick in the devil dick
(Mmm, preach it)
So if you see Santa’s ass this Christmas Eve
Give him a hug and cookies straight from Calvary (Hey now!)
Santa’s so damn jolly
Lucifer just wilts away
But only when you say "Merry Christmas!"
Never "Happy Holidays!"
(Sing it, ladies)
[CAST]
Santa up
Devil down
Better watch that ass
The man in red's in town
Santa’s mean
With a bag full of tricks
[?] Christmas spirit!

[HAWTHORNE & CAST]
Santa up
Devil down

[SINGER, spoken]
Hey!

[HAWTHORNE, spoken]
Yes?

[SINGER, spoken]
You can’t forget about Jesus. 
(Oh, for shame!)

[REVEREND, spoken]
Oh, what’s this now? I would never!

[CAST]
Don’t forget about baby Jesus

[REVEREND, spoken]
My favorite threesome is the holy trinity!

[CAST]
Christ!

[REVEREND, spoken]
Deacon Reggie, [?] We out.