Dog Mom Anthem by T-Spoon and ZZ Tophalf Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Wake up in the morning my dog’s on a routine
Walk him in my jammies don’t care if I'm seen
Covered in fur, poop bags in my pocket
I know I look good so don’t get a red rocket
Casually strolling with a turd in my hand
Wondering where the hell’s the closest trash can
Peeing everywhere Brooklyn Bridge to the Rockies
He’s marking territories what we do on our walkies
Never leave the house without my lint roller
Hell yea I got a geriatric pug in this stroller
Kirnan with Noodle in a stroller
His Instagram is popping I don’t mean maybe
He gets more likes than my sister's baby
If you’re a dog mom here’s your camera roll
It’s just my dog’s face no matter how far you scroll
Storage is full? I'm like, psh, Siri please
That’s why I rock him on my wall, shirt and keys
[Chorus]
If you're a dog mom, put your hands up
This song’s for all the ladies who provide for their pup
When you’re a dog mom this is what you do
Cause they say your not my baby and I know it ain't true
[Verse 2]
Went to the vet cause her poop was volcanic
We put her on a diet now that shit is organic
Bought him elevated bowls I'm a boss breadwinner
Now he doesn't strain his neck while he's eating his dinner
Toys and chews that's where I’m throwing my paper
Don't forget treats! It's turkey-duck flavor
We popping bottle service at the dog-friendly joints
If I can't bring my dog then I just don’t see the point
Here’s an invitation and don't be tardy
I’m going all out for my dog’s birthday party
Show up looking fly and we're sipping on Titos (Zoe)
She's the life of the party: “And her paws smell like Fritos!”
[Chorus]
If you're a dog mom, put your hands up
This song's for all the ladies who provide for their pup
When you're a dog mom this is what you do
Cause they say you're not my baby and I know it ain't true
[Verse 3]
Feeling mad pride when he rips out the stuffing, I even give props when he doesn’t do nothing
You're amazing
On my nanny cam while I’m in a board meeting
Wonder what she's doing “Oh god what are you eating?”
Reunited coming home, yo that shit is sacred
When I take off her collar, it looks like she's naked!
So bomb at belly scratches, I'm like a dog masseuse
And I know he appreciates cause he brings me his Moose!
Don't need a man when I come home
Cause my bed is a literal bone zone
Fall asleep to the sound of you licking your parts
But you wake us both up when you’re scared of your farts
Can’t wait to wake up and do it over again
Say it with me now: dogs are a woman's best friend
Ha! Ha! We out!
But we immediately want to come back in again
Wake up in the morning my dog’s on a routine
Walk him in my jammies don’t care if I'm seen
Covered in fur, poop bags in my pocket
I know I look good so don’t get a red rocket
Casually strolling with a turd in my hand
Wondering where the hell’s the closest trash can
Peeing everywhere Brooklyn Bridge to the Rockies
He’s marking territories what we do on our walkies
Never leave the house without my lint roller
Hell yea I got a geriatric pug in this stroller
Kirnan with Noodle in a stroller
His Instagram is popping I don’t mean maybe
He gets more likes than my sister's baby
If you’re a dog mom here’s your camera roll
It’s just my dog’s face no matter how far you scroll
Storage is full? I'm like, psh, Siri please
That’s why I rock him on my wall, shirt and keys
[Chorus]
If you're a dog mom, put your hands up
This song’s for all the ladies who provide for their pup
When you’re a dog mom this is what you do
Cause they say your not my baby and I know it ain't true
[Verse 2]
Went to the vet cause her poop was volcanic
We put her on a diet now that shit is organic
Bought him elevated bowls I'm a boss breadwinner
Now he doesn't strain his neck while he's eating his dinner
Toys and chews that's where I’m throwing my paper
Don't forget treats! It's turkey-duck flavor
We popping bottle service at the dog-friendly joints
If I can't bring my dog then I just don’t see the point
Here’s an invitation and don't be tardy
I’m going all out for my dog’s birthday party
Show up looking fly and we're sipping on Titos (Zoe)
She's the life of the party: “And her paws smell like Fritos!”
[Chorus]
If you're a dog mom, put your hands up
This song's for all the ladies who provide for their pup
When you're a dog mom this is what you do
Cause they say you're not my baby and I know it ain't true
[Verse 3]
Feeling mad pride when he rips out the stuffing, I even give props when he doesn’t do nothing
You're amazing
On my nanny cam while I’m in a board meeting
Wonder what she's doing “Oh god what are you eating?”
Reunited coming home, yo that shit is sacred
When I take off her collar, it looks like she's naked!
So bomb at belly scratches, I'm like a dog masseuse
And I know he appreciates cause he brings me his Moose!
Don't need a man when I come home
Cause my bed is a literal bone zone
Fall asleep to the sound of you licking your parts
But you wake us both up when you’re scared of your farts
Can’t wait to wake up and do it over again
Say it with me now: dogs are a woman's best friend
Ha! Ha! We out!
But we immediately want to come back in again