John Kasich- GOP Dropout by Randy Rainbow Lyrics
JOHN KASICH:
And as I suspend my campaign today, I have renewed faith that the Lord will show me the way forward
RANDY:
Your story was so long
They fin'lly hit the gong
You floundered and just wound up in the way
I guess it's your bad-news day
You choked on Super Tuesday
And Super Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday
And Saturday and Sunday!
GOP dropout
Baby, it's time to disappear
GOP dropout
Wait. Oh my god. Are you still here?
Well, you seriously bored us, so it's time that you retire
'Cause you look like Harrison Ford if someone locked him in the dryer!
(spoken)
You get that a lot?
(sung)
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
Looks like your campaign was a bomb
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
You had less delegates than my mom!
Now go pack up all your crap and get your ass back on that bus
Hope it was good for you, 'cause Kasich? Mmm, yeah, not for us
(spoken)
Aw, Johnny, I can't tell you how much I'll miss ya
I know it's probably just the father issues my therapist keeps talking about, but I always thought of you as America's dad!
The kind of dad we all can't help but love, even though you're always embarrassing us at parties with your goofy dancing and never letting us get abortions
I hear people when they say you've been single-handedly destroying the Republican Party and potentially the entire country, and that Donald Trump could win as a result of your selfish, narcissistic motivations, but I don't care what people say, Johnny. 'Cause if there's one thing I've learned from you, it's to always be optimistic and never give up on our great country, the United States of America!
Hi, can I get a ticket to Canada?
(sung)
GOP dropout
(spoken)
Yeah, no, definitely just one way
(sung)
Baby, you're movin' pretty slow
GOP dropout (Gurl, get the f**k out)
I wrote this song four months ago. (La-la-la)
But I heard you were resigning now, so thank you, Mr. Kasich
And forgive me, sir, for rhyming now, but frankly, bitch, you're basic!
(spoken)
You get that a lot?
(sung)
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
Johnny, it's time for you to bail
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
You had a snowball's chance in hell!
Go put on your sweats, your delegates are back up on the shelf
Time to buck up, my little buckeye- go buck yourself
(Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
Please friggin' take Ted Cruz with you!
And as I suspend my campaign today, I have renewed faith that the Lord will show me the way forward
RANDY:
Your story was so long
They fin'lly hit the gong
You floundered and just wound up in the way
I guess it's your bad-news day
You choked on Super Tuesday
And Super Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday
And Saturday and Sunday!
GOP dropout
Baby, it's time to disappear
GOP dropout
Wait. Oh my god. Are you still here?
Well, you seriously bored us, so it's time that you retire
'Cause you look like Harrison Ford if someone locked him in the dryer!
(spoken)
You get that a lot?
(sung)
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
Looks like your campaign was a bomb
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
You had less delegates than my mom!
Now go pack up all your crap and get your ass back on that bus
Hope it was good for you, 'cause Kasich? Mmm, yeah, not for us
(spoken)
Aw, Johnny, I can't tell you how much I'll miss ya
I know it's probably just the father issues my therapist keeps talking about, but I always thought of you as America's dad!
The kind of dad we all can't help but love, even though you're always embarrassing us at parties with your goofy dancing and never letting us get abortions
I hear people when they say you've been single-handedly destroying the Republican Party and potentially the entire country, and that Donald Trump could win as a result of your selfish, narcissistic motivations, but I don't care what people say, Johnny. 'Cause if there's one thing I've learned from you, it's to always be optimistic and never give up on our great country, the United States of America!
Hi, can I get a ticket to Canada?
(sung)
GOP dropout
(spoken)
Yeah, no, definitely just one way
(sung)
Baby, you're movin' pretty slow
GOP dropout (Gurl, get the f**k out)
I wrote this song four months ago. (La-la-la)
But I heard you were resigning now, so thank you, Mr. Kasich
And forgive me, sir, for rhyming now, but frankly, bitch, you're basic!
(spoken)
You get that a lot?
(sung)
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
Johnny, it's time for you to bail
GOP dropout (GOP dropout)
You had a snowball's chance in hell!
Go put on your sweats, your delegates are back up on the shelf
Time to buck up, my little buckeye- go buck yourself
(Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
Please friggin' take Ted Cruz with you!