I Wont Name This Song By Myself by Raccoon Venom Lyrics

I drink by myself
Even though I've got a partner and my friends aren't that far away
I think about how excited I was to leave
Now every time I go back I just wanna, just wanna stay

But I love the city
I could see myself stayin' here for a while
It's not perfect of course
I guess I was just in denial
That people would be different
In all the places that I'd go
But it just keeps feelin' more like home

So I drink by myself
Even though I live with my partner
And my friends are just an hour away
And I think about how excited I was to leave
Now I can't stop myself from thinkin' bout
Goin' back
Everyday
But I'm not here for me
I'm here for all the people who see
The good in me
That I don't really see
I don't wanna disappoint them
I just wanna make them happy
One day I hope to make a living
Without waking up every day
Just to hate myself
Just to hate living
But the voices in my head keep tellin' me:

"Give up now. It's probably never gonna happen. You're a piece of shit. You'll never amount to nothin'. and if think you'll live your life in good spirit and good health you're lyin' to yourself"