The Objection Song by PW Musical Productions Lyrics
PHOENIX WRIGHT [spoken]:
Chief, what can I do against eyewitness testimony?!
MIA FEY:
You've got the evidence in the Court Record, Wright. Find a contradiction and raise an objection!
PHOENIX:
Got it! Wait… do what now?
MIA [sung]:
If your client’s innocent
This testimony’s fiction
So check your court record
For the contradiction
It's time to take control
The story’s clearly phony
Present something to poke a hole
In the testimony!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
I see!
MIA [sung]:
The witness is clearly lying
To throw you off your case
So find a contradiction
To rub in his smug face
And after you have made
Your careful selection
Present evidence as your aid and yell
“Objection!"
PHOENIX [spoken]:
So let me get this straight, Mr. Sahwit. You looked into the apartment and saw that the woman was dead. How did you know? She may have just been unconscious
FRANK SAHWIT:
Well, I mean, she was lying completely still on the floor, and there was blood everywhere
LARRY BUTZ:
Blood...? EVERYWHEEEEERE!?
SAHWIT:
It was obvious she was gone. I was too afraid to move. I was completely frozen in fear. I couldn’t even go inside
PHOENIX:
He didn't go inside...? That's probably the fastest contradiction I've ever heard
MIA:
So you’ve got to point it out, Wright
[sung]
What you need to achieve is to grab the court’s attention
In order to make them believe
You must create some tension
How dare the witness tell a lie
While being on the stand?
Look him in the eye and bang your desk
Loudly with your hand
PHOENIX [desk slam, spoken]:
Hold It! You say you didn’t go inside. How did you know the phone wasn’t working?
SAHWIT:
I… er… you see, the phone was on a shelf next to the door. I never went inside! I didn’t go any further than the doorway
MIA:
You’re getting closer, Wright. Don’t let him slither between your fingers
SAHWIT:
Like I said, I found her exactly at 1:00 PM, found out her phone didn’t work, and went to the park to call
PHOENIX:
You say… you found her dead at 1:00…?
MIA:
You’ve got it, Wright. Congratulations
THE JUDGE:
What? I don’t understand. This testimony clearly condemns your client
LARRY:
GIMME THE CHAAAAAIR!
MIA [sighs, sung]:
Now this judge is rather old
His hearing’s not so fine
He’s slowly getting bald
And he needs some kind of sign...!
So go out on a limb, and get his mind to linger
Just focus and then point to him
With your index finger
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Take That, Mr. Sahwit! The autopsy report plainly states that the victim’s time of death was 4:00 PM
SAHWIT:
Ah!
PHOENIX:
Care to explain this three-hour gap?
SAHWIT:
I… I don’t understand! I was absolutely sure it was 1:00! 4:00? That’s impossible… I HEARD the time!
PHOENIX:
Excuse me? How did you HEAR the time?
SAHWIT:
Uh… it must’ve been on a...a radio…uh…television show that announced the time!
PHOENIX:
A TV show? During a blackout!?
SAHWIT:
I must’ve… must’ve made some kind of mistake…I remembered wrong! You’re right, I didn’t hear the time, I SAW the time, on the murder weapon – the clock!
PHOENIX:
Clock…? Witness, the murder weapon was a statue, not a –
WINSTON PAYNE:
And again you are wrong, Mr. Wright. The murder weapon is indeed a clock – it says the time aloud. I didn't bring it up because I thought it was an unnecessary detail
JUDGE:
Mr. Wright, it appears your argument is moot. Do you have anything to add?
MIA:
And at last this case finally begins to unwind. You know what to do, Wright?
PHOENIX:
Let’s do it, Chief!
PHOENIX/MIA [sung]:
The witness is clearly lying
To throw me/you off my/your case
I'll/So find a contradiction
To rub in his smug face
And after I/you have made
My/Your careful selection
I'll/Present evidence as my/your aid
And yell, yell, yell
PHOENIX [desk slam, spoken]:
Objection!
Chief, what can I do against eyewitness testimony?!
MIA FEY:
You've got the evidence in the Court Record, Wright. Find a contradiction and raise an objection!
PHOENIX:
Got it! Wait… do what now?
MIA [sung]:
If your client’s innocent
This testimony’s fiction
So check your court record
For the contradiction
It's time to take control
The story’s clearly phony
Present something to poke a hole
In the testimony!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
I see!
MIA [sung]:
The witness is clearly lying
To throw you off your case
So find a contradiction
To rub in his smug face
And after you have made
Your careful selection
Present evidence as your aid and yell
“Objection!"
PHOENIX [spoken]:
So let me get this straight, Mr. Sahwit. You looked into the apartment and saw that the woman was dead. How did you know? She may have just been unconscious
FRANK SAHWIT:
Well, I mean, she was lying completely still on the floor, and there was blood everywhere
LARRY BUTZ:
Blood...? EVERYWHEEEEERE!?
SAHWIT:
It was obvious she was gone. I was too afraid to move. I was completely frozen in fear. I couldn’t even go inside
PHOENIX:
He didn't go inside...? That's probably the fastest contradiction I've ever heard
MIA:
So you’ve got to point it out, Wright
[sung]
What you need to achieve is to grab the court’s attention
In order to make them believe
You must create some tension
How dare the witness tell a lie
While being on the stand?
Look him in the eye and bang your desk
Loudly with your hand
PHOENIX [desk slam, spoken]:
Hold It! You say you didn’t go inside. How did you know the phone wasn’t working?
SAHWIT:
I… er… you see, the phone was on a shelf next to the door. I never went inside! I didn’t go any further than the doorway
MIA:
You’re getting closer, Wright. Don’t let him slither between your fingers
SAHWIT:
Like I said, I found her exactly at 1:00 PM, found out her phone didn’t work, and went to the park to call
PHOENIX:
You say… you found her dead at 1:00…?
MIA:
You’ve got it, Wright. Congratulations
THE JUDGE:
What? I don’t understand. This testimony clearly condemns your client
LARRY:
GIMME THE CHAAAAAIR!
MIA [sighs, sung]:
Now this judge is rather old
His hearing’s not so fine
He’s slowly getting bald
And he needs some kind of sign...!
So go out on a limb, and get his mind to linger
Just focus and then point to him
With your index finger
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Take That, Mr. Sahwit! The autopsy report plainly states that the victim’s time of death was 4:00 PM
SAHWIT:
Ah!
PHOENIX:
Care to explain this three-hour gap?
SAHWIT:
I… I don’t understand! I was absolutely sure it was 1:00! 4:00? That’s impossible… I HEARD the time!
PHOENIX:
Excuse me? How did you HEAR the time?
SAHWIT:
Uh… it must’ve been on a...a radio…uh…television show that announced the time!
PHOENIX:
A TV show? During a blackout!?
SAHWIT:
I must’ve… must’ve made some kind of mistake…I remembered wrong! You’re right, I didn’t hear the time, I SAW the time, on the murder weapon – the clock!
PHOENIX:
Clock…? Witness, the murder weapon was a statue, not a –
WINSTON PAYNE:
And again you are wrong, Mr. Wright. The murder weapon is indeed a clock – it says the time aloud. I didn't bring it up because I thought it was an unnecessary detail
JUDGE:
Mr. Wright, it appears your argument is moot. Do you have anything to add?
MIA:
And at last this case finally begins to unwind. You know what to do, Wright?
PHOENIX:
Let’s do it, Chief!
PHOENIX/MIA [sung]:
The witness is clearly lying
To throw me/you off my/your case
I'll/So find a contradiction
To rub in his smug face
And after I/you have made
My/Your careful selection
I'll/Present evidence as my/your aid
And yell, yell, yell
PHOENIX [desk slam, spoken]:
Objection!