A Guy You Can Trust by PW Musical Productions Lyrics
DICK GUMSHOE [sung]:
I consider myself to be a real man's man, see
The kinda guy who won't back down from a fight
I keep this city clean, pal, and I live like a king
Though I eat ramen noodles every night
But despite my gruff exterior, I know I ain't superior
My skills at solving crimes can sometimes rust...
But I'm swallowing my pride, this time I'm on your side
And I'm the kinda guy that you can trust!
Well, I know we've butted heads before, startin' with the case of Harry Butz
(PHOENIX WRIGHT [spoken]: That's 'Larry')
And if the chief catches me helpin' you, he'll probably think I'm nuts
(PHOENIX [spoken]: If hе doesn't already)
But see, pal, this is differеnt from that Redd White trial back in May
(PHOENIX [spoken]: August!)
'Cause I'm sure Mr. Edgeworth is innocent, unlike the client you had that day!
MAYA FEY [spoken]:
Hey, that was me!
GUMSHOE:
Oh, yeah... Sorry, pal
PHOENIX:
Oh, boy...
GUMSHOE [sung]:
So if you need help, just call me and
I'll be there in a flash!
And just to show we're pals now
I'll lend you anything that ain't cash!
MAYA:
Oh thank you, kind detective! Von Karma will eat our
Dust!
GUMSHOE:
We'll find the lies, now I'm the kinda guy that you can
Trust!
[spoken]
And I'm being serious with you, too, now, pal! If there's anything that I can do to help get Mr. Edgeworth declared "Not Guilty," well, let's just say we're a team now, pal!
PHOENIX:
Ah...well, considering the past few cases where you happened to make things worse for our defendants, maybe we—
MAYA:
Nick! Detective Gumshoe is putting his job on the line for us. The least you can do is take advantage of it!
GUMSHOE:
Yeah, that's right, pal!
MAYA:
Detective, any chance you could help us find Gourdy somehow?
GUMSHOE:
Oh, you bet! I've got three secret weapons I could lend ya, so listen up and take your pick
[sung]
First up, shake hands with our department's best evidence-seeking tool
(MISSILE: Woof woof!)
(MAYA [spoken]: Aw, cute!)
This pooch is so advanced it makes me look like a bumbling fool!
(PHOENIX [spoken]: Imagine that.)
I found him in the gutter, on a sad, cold winter's night
He's my pal, though he gives the hand that feeds him quite a bite
(MAYA [spoken]: Wait, he bites?)
You can call him Missile; he'll find any drugs or clues you need
PHOENIX:
Well, he should come in handy if the Gourd Lake Monster's been smoking weed
GUMSHOE:
Hey! No need for sarcasm, Missile's helped with many a bust
And if you feed him, he's the kinda guy that you can trust!
The second here's this fishing pole and my fondest memory
Of a fishing trip I got to take with Maggey, a cute trainee!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Hold it!
[sung]
We can't catch Gourdy with that!
And we can't sit around and just wait!
MAYA [spoken]:
Heh, why not?
GUMSHOE:
Well, pal
[sung]
You'll only know if you try!
You just need the right kind of bait!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Oh yeah! Like, uh...Missile?
[Overlapping]
GUMSHOE:
What!? Don't make me put you under arrest, pal!
MAYA:
Nick!? You're the worst
PHOENIX:
Sorry, sorry!
[End overlapping]
GUMSHOE [sung]:
I've saved the best for last, this metal detector's real intense!
Last month this baby even found me twenty-five whole cents!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Wait, wait
[sung]
We're looking for a monster, not change from someone's pants
GUMSHOE:
Well, you never know, pal, it may have been eating soda cans!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Of course!
GUMSHOE [sung]:
So that's what I can lend ya, my loyal lawyer chums!
MAYA:
Oh wow, they're all so perfect!
PHOENIX [spoken rhythmically]
Um yeah, I can't pick just one...oof
GUMSHOE [sung]:
Now go help Mr. Edgeworth! To free him is a must!
And I'm the kinda guy you can trust!
Cha!
...Pal
I consider myself to be a real man's man, see
The kinda guy who won't back down from a fight
I keep this city clean, pal, and I live like a king
Though I eat ramen noodles every night
But despite my gruff exterior, I know I ain't superior
My skills at solving crimes can sometimes rust...
But I'm swallowing my pride, this time I'm on your side
And I'm the kinda guy that you can trust!
Well, I know we've butted heads before, startin' with the case of Harry Butz
(PHOENIX WRIGHT [spoken]: That's 'Larry')
And if the chief catches me helpin' you, he'll probably think I'm nuts
(PHOENIX [spoken]: If hе doesn't already)
But see, pal, this is differеnt from that Redd White trial back in May
(PHOENIX [spoken]: August!)
'Cause I'm sure Mr. Edgeworth is innocent, unlike the client you had that day!
MAYA FEY [spoken]:
Hey, that was me!
GUMSHOE:
Oh, yeah... Sorry, pal
PHOENIX:
Oh, boy...
GUMSHOE [sung]:
So if you need help, just call me and
I'll be there in a flash!
And just to show we're pals now
I'll lend you anything that ain't cash!
MAYA:
Oh thank you, kind detective! Von Karma will eat our
Dust!
GUMSHOE:
We'll find the lies, now I'm the kinda guy that you can
Trust!
[spoken]
And I'm being serious with you, too, now, pal! If there's anything that I can do to help get Mr. Edgeworth declared "Not Guilty," well, let's just say we're a team now, pal!
PHOENIX:
Ah...well, considering the past few cases where you happened to make things worse for our defendants, maybe we—
MAYA:
Nick! Detective Gumshoe is putting his job on the line for us. The least you can do is take advantage of it!
GUMSHOE:
Yeah, that's right, pal!
MAYA:
Detective, any chance you could help us find Gourdy somehow?
GUMSHOE:
Oh, you bet! I've got three secret weapons I could lend ya, so listen up and take your pick
[sung]
First up, shake hands with our department's best evidence-seeking tool
(MISSILE: Woof woof!)
(MAYA [spoken]: Aw, cute!)
This pooch is so advanced it makes me look like a bumbling fool!
(PHOENIX [spoken]: Imagine that.)
I found him in the gutter, on a sad, cold winter's night
He's my pal, though he gives the hand that feeds him quite a bite
(MAYA [spoken]: Wait, he bites?)
You can call him Missile; he'll find any drugs or clues you need
PHOENIX:
Well, he should come in handy if the Gourd Lake Monster's been smoking weed
GUMSHOE:
Hey! No need for sarcasm, Missile's helped with many a bust
And if you feed him, he's the kinda guy that you can trust!
The second here's this fishing pole and my fondest memory
Of a fishing trip I got to take with Maggey, a cute trainee!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Hold it!
[sung]
We can't catch Gourdy with that!
And we can't sit around and just wait!
MAYA [spoken]:
Heh, why not?
GUMSHOE:
Well, pal
[sung]
You'll only know if you try!
You just need the right kind of bait!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Oh yeah! Like, uh...Missile?
[Overlapping]
GUMSHOE:
What!? Don't make me put you under arrest, pal!
MAYA:
Nick!? You're the worst
PHOENIX:
Sorry, sorry!
[End overlapping]
GUMSHOE [sung]:
I've saved the best for last, this metal detector's real intense!
Last month this baby even found me twenty-five whole cents!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Wait, wait
[sung]
We're looking for a monster, not change from someone's pants
GUMSHOE:
Well, you never know, pal, it may have been eating soda cans!
PHOENIX [spoken]:
Of course!
GUMSHOE [sung]:
So that's what I can lend ya, my loyal lawyer chums!
MAYA:
Oh wow, they're all so perfect!
PHOENIX [spoken rhythmically]
Um yeah, I can't pick just one...oof
GUMSHOE [sung]:
Now go help Mr. Edgeworth! To free him is a must!
And I'm the kinda guy you can trust!
Cha!
...Pal