ʸᵀᴾᴹᵛ Steamed Hams Inc. by NPCarlsson Lyrics
[Intro]
Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho no (Steamed Clams)
Well, Seymour, I made it- (Steamed Hams)
Despite your directions (Steamed Clams)
Superintendent Chalmers (Steamed Hams)
I hope you're prepared for Steamed Hams (Eeh)
Egads! My roast is ruined! (But, what if) (Steamed Clams)
I were to purchase fast food (Steamed Hams)
(And) disguise it as my own cooking? (Steamed Clams)
Delightfully Devilish, Seymour
Seymour!
[Verse 1]
Superintendent Chalmers, I was just uh-
S-stretching my calves on the windowsill! (uh uh)
Isometric exercise! Care to join me? (care to join me?)
Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?
Uh- Oh! That isn't smoke! Uh- Ah, It's steam
Steam from the steamed clams we're having! (Steamed Clams)
Mm-mmmm-mmmm-mmmm-mm (Steamed Clams) (Steamed Hams) (uh)
Whew!
[Chorus]
Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouth-watering hamburgers!
I thought we were having steamed clams
D'oh, no! I said “steamed hams”!
That's what I call hamburgers!
You call hamburgers steamed hams?
It's a regional dialect
Uhuh, uh-what region?
Uuuuh Upstate New York
Really? Well -
[Verse 2]
I'm from Utica, and I've never heard
Anyone use the phrase "steamed hams."
Oh, not in Utica. No. It's an Albany expression
You know, these hamburgers are quite similar (yes)
To the ones they have at Krusty Burger (yes)
Old family recipe! Ho ho (ho) ho ho (ho) no
For steamed hams?
Yes, Steamed Hams
Yes, and you call them steamed hams, despite the fact
Despite the fact that they are obviously grilled
You know, the- One thing I should- I see
And yet, you steam the ham?
Patentant Skinner Burgers! Oh ho (ho) ho ho (ho) no (ho) (ho) (Of course)
[Pre-Chorus]
Well, that was wonderful (Steamed Clams)
A good time was had by all (I’m pooped) (Steamed Hams)
Yes. I should be- Good Lord (Steamed Clams)
What is happening in there!? (Steamed Hams)
[Chorus]
Aurora Borealis
Uh- Aurora Borealis?
Aurora Borealis
At this time of day?
Aurora Borealis. (Aurora Borealis?)
Aurora Borealis. (Aurora Borealis?)
In this part of the country!? (Yes)
Within your kitchen?
No
[Outro]
Seymour! The house is on fire!
No, Mother. It's just the northern lights (Ho ho ho ho no) (Steamed Hams)
Well, Seymour, I must say, (Steamed Clams)
You are an odd fellow, but you steam a good ham. (Steamed Hams) (Steamed Hams)
(Steamed Clams) (Steamed Clams)
HELP! HEEEEEELP!! (Steamed Hams) (Steamed Hams)
HEEEEEELP!! (Steamed Clams) (Steamed Clams)
(Steamed Hams) (Steamed Hams)
Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho no (Steamed Clams)
Well, Seymour, I made it- (Steamed Hams)
Despite your directions (Steamed Clams)
Superintendent Chalmers (Steamed Hams)
I hope you're prepared for Steamed Hams (Eeh)
Egads! My roast is ruined! (But, what if) (Steamed Clams)
I were to purchase fast food (Steamed Hams)
(And) disguise it as my own cooking? (Steamed Clams)
Delightfully Devilish, Seymour
Seymour!
[Verse 1]
Superintendent Chalmers, I was just uh-
S-stretching my calves on the windowsill! (uh uh)
Isometric exercise! Care to join me? (care to join me?)
Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?
Uh- Oh! That isn't smoke! Uh- Ah, It's steam
Steam from the steamed clams we're having! (Steamed Clams)
Mm-mmmm-mmmm-mmmm-mm (Steamed Clams) (Steamed Hams) (uh)
Whew!
[Chorus]
Superintendent, I hope you're ready for mouth-watering hamburgers!
I thought we were having steamed clams
D'oh, no! I said “steamed hams”!
That's what I call hamburgers!
You call hamburgers steamed hams?
It's a regional dialect
Uhuh, uh-what region?
Uuuuh Upstate New York
Really? Well -
[Verse 2]
I'm from Utica, and I've never heard
Anyone use the phrase "steamed hams."
Oh, not in Utica. No. It's an Albany expression
You know, these hamburgers are quite similar (yes)
To the ones they have at Krusty Burger (yes)
Old family recipe! Ho ho (ho) ho ho (ho) no
For steamed hams?
Yes, Steamed Hams
Yes, and you call them steamed hams, despite the fact
Despite the fact that they are obviously grilled
You know, the- One thing I should- I see
And yet, you steam the ham?
Patentant Skinner Burgers! Oh ho (ho) ho ho (ho) no (ho) (ho) (Of course)
[Pre-Chorus]
Well, that was wonderful (Steamed Clams)
A good time was had by all (I’m pooped) (Steamed Hams)
Yes. I should be- Good Lord (Steamed Clams)
What is happening in there!? (Steamed Hams)
[Chorus]
Aurora Borealis
Uh- Aurora Borealis?
Aurora Borealis
At this time of day?
Aurora Borealis. (Aurora Borealis?)
Aurora Borealis. (Aurora Borealis?)
In this part of the country!? (Yes)
Within your kitchen?
No
[Outro]
Seymour! The house is on fire!
No, Mother. It's just the northern lights (Ho ho ho ho no) (Steamed Hams)
Well, Seymour, I must say, (Steamed Clams)
You are an odd fellow, but you steam a good ham. (Steamed Hams) (Steamed Hams)
(Steamed Clams) (Steamed Clams)
HELP! HEEEEEELP!! (Steamed Hams) (Steamed Hams)
HEEEEEELP!! (Steamed Clams) (Steamed Clams)
(Steamed Hams) (Steamed Hams)