More Kissing in Porn Please Were British by Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer Lyrics

(moaning)

Now I am a man of the simplest of pleasures

I'll read an erotic pamphlet of my leasure

But never with anything else on my mind

Then making the most of the passing of time

I'm a romantic at heart as you know

But I'm also starting to grow

So I'll delve slightly deeper inside

Until I find something that turns my insides

The tide has turned, it seems

When all of my dreams on amorous themes
And holding hands have been dashed

Long before the bishop's been bashed

The cash to be made from depravity

And filling bodily cavities in darkened lavatories

Have replaced the seductive arts

So a crusade I'm going to start:

Why can't there be more kissing in porn

Something here is rather missing or wrong

Why can't there be more kissing in porn

Where has all the romance gone?

(moaning)

[spoken: stop that]

Now I like to think my doctrine is methodical
I've flipped through pages of Anamata periodical

I can see nothing too deep on

"Good lord, that thing is the size of a tree trunk"

My theory is simple enough

A little more kissing

A little less muff

Is the start of a gentleman's

Night timely dreams

And not the extremes

That are brought on these screams

And these harlots and charlatans

And g-strings and tan lines

And from where this gentle-
Man rhymes

There's no sense of whimsy

Their plots are so flimsy

And ten seconds in it's just wall to wall mimsy

It seems to me something must be done

I don't want to see one single more rerun

Of some rotter chuffing in some filly's face:

I raise a petition and clean up the place!

Why can't there be more kissing in porn

All I can see is pissing and scorn

Why can't there be more kissing in porn

Where has all the romance gone?

(moaning)

[Kissing in porn] x6

(more moaning)

{To shave and a haircut}That's why I like kissing...in porn