Back At It Again by KiddGlokk Lyrics
Verse 1:
I can't sleep at night, I just toss and turn
I can’t eat, hunger was lost at birth
I feel weak, both physically and mentally
I can’t beat these demons out of me
I'm lifting my head trying to catch my breath
But try to stay sane, when you live in your deathbed
Verse 2:
It's like I’m constantly having to fight for my life
I'll reach the point where I’d rather slowly die
So I just might grab a knife
Slit open my throat so I can finally speak my mind
Or should I put a rope around my neck and tie
Hang myself from the sky, so I can really see the light
Maybe if I take my life with a nine
Pull the trigger to my head, to open my third eye
Or should I down a bottle of pills at night
Overdose, over the rainbow, to reach the dark side
Chorus:
I just don’t want to live anymore
But what if my mom walks through my door
Will I still be a disappointment, maybe then even more
If she sees me lying dead on the floor
I can’t do this anymore, feeling so deeply alone
It’s not a want, it's a need, is there any other way to go
Verse 3:
I live in fear that staying alive will draw me near
My real self, what if its someone I just can’t spend the rest of my years
This is no way to live, no way to die, but I still
Can’t find a way out of this casket that I built
And I don’t know what scares me more, staying alive
Or being remembered as a fucking suicide
Should I stay alive or take my life
But really, I can’t take something that was never mine
Chorus:
I just don’t want to live anymore
But what if my mom walks through my door
Will I still be a disappointment, maybe then even more
If she sees me lying dead on the floor
I can’t do this anymore, feeling so deeply alone
It’s not a want, it's a need, is there any other way to go
Verse 4:
I’m just existing, I’m just here, I am not freely living
Take my life or take a life? Who am I kidding
Hook:
All-be-damned, I’m back at it again
Me and my mind blowing up like the Taliban
Yeah, my stress up, but I'm blessed up
Not at all
Bitch I’m messed up
Now there’s blood in the bathroom stall
Verse 5:
A switch to my wrist
Shooting my shot
But I’ve only ever missed
Obviously she don’t want me
I’m a mess who’s always depressed
I’ve tried to find love
But someone always fucks it up
First time that I’ve smiled in a while
But it doesn’t even matter
Every time I see those pictures
Makes me sadder
I’m going insane
Called a Mad Hatter
Verse 6:
And one thing that I love and hate the most
Is people always change but the memories don't
And lately I can't even eat
Lately I’ve been feeling ill
When you cannot sleep at night
That's when you know shit is real
You don't even need a gun
You don't even need a pill
If you ever wanna die
Fall in love and you’ll get killed…
I can't sleep at night, I just toss and turn
I can’t eat, hunger was lost at birth
I feel weak, both physically and mentally
I can’t beat these demons out of me
I'm lifting my head trying to catch my breath
But try to stay sane, when you live in your deathbed
Verse 2:
It's like I’m constantly having to fight for my life
I'll reach the point where I’d rather slowly die
So I just might grab a knife
Slit open my throat so I can finally speak my mind
Or should I put a rope around my neck and tie
Hang myself from the sky, so I can really see the light
Maybe if I take my life with a nine
Pull the trigger to my head, to open my third eye
Or should I down a bottle of pills at night
Overdose, over the rainbow, to reach the dark side
Chorus:
I just don’t want to live anymore
But what if my mom walks through my door
Will I still be a disappointment, maybe then even more
If she sees me lying dead on the floor
I can’t do this anymore, feeling so deeply alone
It’s not a want, it's a need, is there any other way to go
Verse 3:
I live in fear that staying alive will draw me near
My real self, what if its someone I just can’t spend the rest of my years
This is no way to live, no way to die, but I still
Can’t find a way out of this casket that I built
And I don’t know what scares me more, staying alive
Or being remembered as a fucking suicide
Should I stay alive or take my life
But really, I can’t take something that was never mine
Chorus:
I just don’t want to live anymore
But what if my mom walks through my door
Will I still be a disappointment, maybe then even more
If she sees me lying dead on the floor
I can’t do this anymore, feeling so deeply alone
It’s not a want, it's a need, is there any other way to go
Verse 4:
I’m just existing, I’m just here, I am not freely living
Take my life or take a life? Who am I kidding
Hook:
All-be-damned, I’m back at it again
Me and my mind blowing up like the Taliban
Yeah, my stress up, but I'm blessed up
Not at all
Bitch I’m messed up
Now there’s blood in the bathroom stall
Verse 5:
A switch to my wrist
Shooting my shot
But I’ve only ever missed
Obviously she don’t want me
I’m a mess who’s always depressed
I’ve tried to find love
But someone always fucks it up
First time that I’ve smiled in a while
But it doesn’t even matter
Every time I see those pictures
Makes me sadder
I’m going insane
Called a Mad Hatter
Verse 6:
And one thing that I love and hate the most
Is people always change but the memories don't
And lately I can't even eat
Lately I’ve been feeling ill
When you cannot sleep at night
That's when you know shit is real
You don't even need a gun
You don't even need a pill
If you ever wanna die
Fall in love and you’ll get killed…