Kevin Podcast 1 by Kevin and the Bikes Lyrics
Hey- Hey guys, we're, uh, we’re taking a little break from the songs for now, and we're gonna do a, uh, a live Kevin podcast where we talk about Kevin
Yeah, it was- it was too much work
Joined with me is, um... is Kevin Boy #2, I'm Kevin Boy #1, and we have a special guest-
- I didn’t agree to be called Kevin Boy #2
- Hello, I- I am-
And we have a special guest...
- I'm still protesting
- I-I'm supposed to repre-
Man, shut the fuck up, I introduce you!
Oh, okay
Um, we have a special guest on air, his name is Kevin Boy #3
But that's not my name. But...
- It's not my-
- My na...
I'm supposed to play the role of the bike, here. Because, there is no Kevin
So, this podca-
- Oh, okay
For this podcast we're gonna talk about Kevin's bike
Before- before we talk about that, I wanna talk about our names, ’cause that’s gonna lead to a lot of confusion, I mean, like, what if, like, what if it's an emergency situation, you’re like...
- I mean...
...In the hospital, I'm like, "Kevin Boy", you're gonna go, like "Wait, are you in the hospital, am I in the hospital? Is he in the hospital?"
-No, we go... we go... we go Kevin Boy #... #1, #2, and #3...
Yeah, I know...
- #1, #2, and #3
- But, I'm...
- That’s how I see it, [?]!
You're #2, you're #3 and I'm #1
Bu... But that's so many syllables, like, I'm gonna run out of things to say...
Ok, what do you want your names to be?
Uh, I would like to be referred to as Pablo
Nope! Nope! Not allowed!
Alright, fine, I'll be Nivek
Nope!
Yeah- Yeah, Nivek
Okay
What do you wanna be?
I wanna be... Leather. Just, leather
Okay I'll st-
- No, no, you're pleather, you don't get a choice, no, you have to be off-brand fake leather, you're pleather
Pleather works as well. I will take pleather, that's
- I'm, I'm gonna be Kevin Boy, just because any other name is, is fucking gay
Oh yeah, well, my name's Kevin backwards
I fuck babes like you for a living
Yeah
You're still fucking gay
I already was gay... I'm gay
Yeah
You just said you weren't
There's a dis- there's a discon... discontinuity here
- Okay, so let's talk about Kevin's bike! How many... How many wheels does it have?
Uh, two
I don't know, I've seen it have three on some special occasions. I don't know about you
If it had more it'd be a...
- Oh, you see, I have... I have two, that's...
If it had more it'd be a car or a trike. It wouldn't be a bike
Fucking prove it
Are you sure about that? Do you have his bike right here?
- See, see, see, B is the second letter in the alphabet and is the first letter in the thing, and so that means there's two wheels. And T is the third letter in the alphabet... T is the third letter in the alphabet... That's why... The tricycle, the trike has three wheels, 'cause the third letter in the alphabet, and...
- Yeah, well, Pleather, that do you th...
Pleather? Well if you go...
- Pleather, what do you think of this situation?
If you go a few letter in the alphaget... Alphabet...
A... Alphaget
Yeah, if you go a few letters forward... Um...
Don't forget the alphabet
Can I curse in this word? Can I curse in this... this podcast?
Yeah, of course. It's cursing
Kike
This actually isn't live. It's in the middle of... Of...
It's in the middle of this shitty album that we're recording
Oh
So, hey, you know what's a bigger concern for me?
- Fuck
Where- What town are they located in?
Uh, Peach Creek
Yeah, but... But where is that? Like, that's what I mean moreso, like, is it in the midwest?
It's in... [?]
It might be self-contained
- It might be in Canada
It- It- Oh, it might be in Canada
Because they're Canadian
How do you know that, though?
There's an episode, though, where they're, like, falling from space or something and they fall towards, like, California, so I feel like it's in California, or, like, Southern [?]
I feel like I see a Canadian flag in the background
Where's the background? The fuck do you know it's a Canadian flag?
I'm not Canadian...
Exactly, that's what I thought
Um, so, this concludes Kevin podcast...
- Yeah, I'm so close I always thought I was Canadian, which I am
Uh... Actual- Any final thoughts? Kevin Boy?
What do you mean final thoughts? We're not over, this is going on another hour
I have quite a few things to say, first of all
Yeah, I'd speak my mind, about the Jewish question, I have some problems with that. Kay?
Why's there gotta be a question? Why they gotta be Jewish?
That's a good question. That's a very good question
-Right?
Now, I- I have a final solution to this...
I, uh okay! That concludes the end of the podcast, thank you!
- [?], I haven't got my answers! My- my secrets! The world must know! Guys, the secret to curing the uh, Jewish question is, is, to not let Todd unpause th-
Yeah, it was- it was too much work
Joined with me is, um... is Kevin Boy #2, I'm Kevin Boy #1, and we have a special guest-
- I didn’t agree to be called Kevin Boy #2
- Hello, I- I am-
And we have a special guest...
- I'm still protesting
- I-I'm supposed to repre-
Man, shut the fuck up, I introduce you!
Oh, okay
Um, we have a special guest on air, his name is Kevin Boy #3
But that's not my name. But...
- It's not my-
- My na...
I'm supposed to play the role of the bike, here. Because, there is no Kevin
So, this podca-
- Oh, okay
For this podcast we're gonna talk about Kevin's bike
Before- before we talk about that, I wanna talk about our names, ’cause that’s gonna lead to a lot of confusion, I mean, like, what if, like, what if it's an emergency situation, you’re like...
- I mean...
...In the hospital, I'm like, "Kevin Boy", you're gonna go, like "Wait, are you in the hospital, am I in the hospital? Is he in the hospital?"
-No, we go... we go... we go Kevin Boy #... #1, #2, and #3...
Yeah, I know...
- #1, #2, and #3
- But, I'm...
- That’s how I see it, [?]!
You're #2, you're #3 and I'm #1
Bu... But that's so many syllables, like, I'm gonna run out of things to say...
Ok, what do you want your names to be?
Uh, I would like to be referred to as Pablo
Nope! Nope! Not allowed!
Alright, fine, I'll be Nivek
Nope!
Yeah- Yeah, Nivek
Okay
What do you wanna be?
I wanna be... Leather. Just, leather
Okay I'll st-
- No, no, you're pleather, you don't get a choice, no, you have to be off-brand fake leather, you're pleather
Pleather works as well. I will take pleather, that's
- I'm, I'm gonna be Kevin Boy, just because any other name is, is fucking gay
Oh yeah, well, my name's Kevin backwards
I fuck babes like you for a living
Yeah
You're still fucking gay
I already was gay... I'm gay
Yeah
You just said you weren't
There's a dis- there's a discon... discontinuity here
- Okay, so let's talk about Kevin's bike! How many... How many wheels does it have?
Uh, two
I don't know, I've seen it have three on some special occasions. I don't know about you
If it had more it'd be a...
- Oh, you see, I have... I have two, that's...
If it had more it'd be a car or a trike. It wouldn't be a bike
Fucking prove it
Are you sure about that? Do you have his bike right here?
- See, see, see, B is the second letter in the alphabet and is the first letter in the thing, and so that means there's two wheels. And T is the third letter in the alphabet... T is the third letter in the alphabet... That's why... The tricycle, the trike has three wheels, 'cause the third letter in the alphabet, and...
- Yeah, well, Pleather, that do you th...
Pleather? Well if you go...
- Pleather, what do you think of this situation?
If you go a few letter in the alphaget... Alphabet...
A... Alphaget
Yeah, if you go a few letters forward... Um...
Don't forget the alphabet
Can I curse in this word? Can I curse in this... this podcast?
Yeah, of course. It's cursing
Kike
This actually isn't live. It's in the middle of... Of...
It's in the middle of this shitty album that we're recording
Oh
So, hey, you know what's a bigger concern for me?
- Fuck
Where- What town are they located in?
Uh, Peach Creek
Yeah, but... But where is that? Like, that's what I mean moreso, like, is it in the midwest?
It's in... [?]
It might be self-contained
- It might be in Canada
It- It- Oh, it might be in Canada
Because they're Canadian
How do you know that, though?
There's an episode, though, where they're, like, falling from space or something and they fall towards, like, California, so I feel like it's in California, or, like, Southern [?]
I feel like I see a Canadian flag in the background
Where's the background? The fuck do you know it's a Canadian flag?
I'm not Canadian...
Exactly, that's what I thought
Um, so, this concludes Kevin podcast...
- Yeah, I'm so close I always thought I was Canadian, which I am
Uh... Actual- Any final thoughts? Kevin Boy?
What do you mean final thoughts? We're not over, this is going on another hour
I have quite a few things to say, first of all
Yeah, I'd speak my mind, about the Jewish question, I have some problems with that. Kay?
Why's there gotta be a question? Why they gotta be Jewish?
That's a good question. That's a very good question
-Right?
Now, I- I have a final solution to this...
I, uh okay! That concludes the end of the podcast, thank you!
- [?], I haven't got my answers! My- my secrets! The world must know! Guys, the secret to curing the uh, Jewish question is, is, to not let Todd unpause th-