Bitter Prayer by Joshie Bizzle Lyrics
[Verse 1]
Look
I never trust You when I should
I grew up with no dad
Residence was in the hood
Relationship with Madre? Never there
Put my trust in no soul
My mentality - placed me - in a stronghold
Wish sometimes for things to be different
Like having two parents who never felt so indifferent
Or maybe lessons that can only come from my Papa
But you want me to look towards the sky and call You Abba?
I want to do good things, and especially through You
But if I fail, feel condemnation, and always run from You
And in my failure, suffer from anger issues
I always push away the people correcting me
It's hard to take because I want to be perfect
A thorn in my side, I feel like Paul writing Romans
I'm feeling called to college. Time to start that enrollment
But if I fail, what do I do? I cannot control it
You say, “Son, place your faith in Me."
And I respond, super scared
Like “Get away from me”
It shouldn't be that way, Lord I know our History
Yet I know when I draw breath that that's Your gift to me
Knowing I should be Yours, serving You faithfully
It's a tough mindset to break. Help my mentality
And I've been searching for answers, with no one helping me
So I've been wondering about, walking aimlessly
[Hook x2]
Or
At least, that's how I feel
This is my prayer to You
I'm trying to keep it real
Backsliding for as long as I can remember
Chasing what I've never had as far back as December
[Verse 2]
But check it…
I picked up a couple spiritual fathers
Sometimes they're so busy that I don't even call'em
Can't recall the last time that I spoke to the latest
Father figures run dry. I've been avoiding the Greatest
Spending time in my Egypt, avoiding Your promises
Would receive Your freedom, but faith just like Thomas’
God rewind the clock
And give me a father, please
Sands of time keep moving
And I want me a redo
I went from child to man with no direction from Papa
I've searched from father to father, man when the answer is Abba
Hands looked like pray emoji, but tapped and no longer bother
Onegaishimasu, Kami-sama
Onegaishimasu Kami-sama
Oh, won't You do this for me?
Bitter prayer from a loner
Must accept reality
At times it's too much to take
I'm the big two five now
Gotta move forward and think
Before I go on without You, Jesus
And eventually sink…
[Hook x2]
Or
At least, that's how I feel
This is my prayer to You
I'm trying to keep it real
Backsliding for as long as I can remember
Chasing what I've never had as far back as December
Look
I never trust You when I should
I grew up with no dad
Residence was in the hood
Relationship with Madre? Never there
Put my trust in no soul
My mentality - placed me - in a stronghold
Wish sometimes for things to be different
Like having two parents who never felt so indifferent
Or maybe lessons that can only come from my Papa
But you want me to look towards the sky and call You Abba?
I want to do good things, and especially through You
But if I fail, feel condemnation, and always run from You
And in my failure, suffer from anger issues
I always push away the people correcting me
It's hard to take because I want to be perfect
A thorn in my side, I feel like Paul writing Romans
I'm feeling called to college. Time to start that enrollment
But if I fail, what do I do? I cannot control it
You say, “Son, place your faith in Me."
And I respond, super scared
Like “Get away from me”
It shouldn't be that way, Lord I know our History
Yet I know when I draw breath that that's Your gift to me
Knowing I should be Yours, serving You faithfully
It's a tough mindset to break. Help my mentality
And I've been searching for answers, with no one helping me
So I've been wondering about, walking aimlessly
[Hook x2]
Or
At least, that's how I feel
This is my prayer to You
I'm trying to keep it real
Backsliding for as long as I can remember
Chasing what I've never had as far back as December
[Verse 2]
But check it…
I picked up a couple spiritual fathers
Sometimes they're so busy that I don't even call'em
Can't recall the last time that I spoke to the latest
Father figures run dry. I've been avoiding the Greatest
Spending time in my Egypt, avoiding Your promises
Would receive Your freedom, but faith just like Thomas’
God rewind the clock
And give me a father, please
Sands of time keep moving
And I want me a redo
I went from child to man with no direction from Papa
I've searched from father to father, man when the answer is Abba
Hands looked like pray emoji, but tapped and no longer bother
Onegaishimasu, Kami-sama
Onegaishimasu Kami-sama
Oh, won't You do this for me?
Bitter prayer from a loner
Must accept reality
At times it's too much to take
I'm the big two five now
Gotta move forward and think
Before I go on without You, Jesus
And eventually sink…
[Hook x2]
Or
At least, that's how I feel
This is my prayer to You
I'm trying to keep it real
Backsliding for as long as I can remember
Chasing what I've never had as far back as December