Mr. Jaws by Dickie Goodman Lyrics

We are here on the beach
Where a giant shark has just eaten a girl swimmer
Well, Mr. Jaws, how was it?
"Dynomite"
And what did she say when you grabbed her?
"Please, Mister, please"

I know sharks are stupid
But what did you think when you took that first bite?
"How sweet it is"
Mr. Jaws, before you swim out to sea
Have you anything else to say?
"Why can't we be friends
Why can't we be friends"

With me now is the local sheriff
Sheriff Brody, the shark will be back for lunch
What do you intend to do?
"Do a little dance
Make a little love
Get down tonight"
Just arriving is oceanographer Matt Hooper
Sir, if someone is attacked by a shark
What should they do?
"Do the hustle"

We are going aboard the fishing boat of Captain Quint
Captain, will you be able to catch this giant shark?
"I will, I will, I will"
Thank you, captain, captain
"I will, I will, I will"
Captain, captain
When you catch one of these sharks
What do you feel like?
"Like a Rhinestone Cowboy"

We've just sighted the shark again
He's coming straight for us
Captain Quint is shouting
Something at him
"Get you, baby
One of these nights"

Hey, Jaws, the captain says he's going to catch you
What do you think of that?
"Jive talking"
Uh-oh
Here he comes again
They've hit him
Mr. Jaws, why doesn't anything seem to hurt you?
"Big boys don't cry
Big boys don't cry"
He's coming
Right onto the boat
Mr. Jaws, why are you grabbing my hand?
"Wouldn't you give your hand to a friend?"
No, wait, Mr. Jaws
That's not the way this record is supposed to end
Help, help!
(Glub, glub)