Ted by Buffering the Vampire Slayer Lyrics

[Verse 1]
Here lies Ted
Ted is dead
May he rest
In little pieces
Scraps all heaped up
To the sky

[Verse 2]
Here lies Ted
No tears shed
He always said
“take no malarkey”
And he had no heartbeat
In his chest

[Verse 3]
Here lies Ted
The evidence
Of four ex-wives
Found in a closet
In his apartment
Underground
*whistling*

[Verse 4]
Here lies Ted
May he rest
In deep distress
And never call me
“little lady”
Ever again